Thursday, August 17, 2006

A Small, Disgusting World

I am a member of an online community called A Small World (aSW). In recent weeks, its discussion boards have been filled with debates on Lebanon, Hizballah, Israel etc. By sheer weight of numbers, aided by staged and doctored media reports, the "destroy Israel" (sorry, I mean "Israel is being disproportionate") grouping have filled the many threads and posts with enough vitriol that the aSW management made a decision to shut down any Middle East-related threads, under a "ceasefire" agreement. Luckily, they have been much more successful in persuading the pro-Hizballah wing to disarm than the UN will be on the ground.

In response to the site owner, Scott Rutherford's posting to anonunce the ceasefire, I sent this (subsequently I removed it because the usual suspects, who had previously called me a terrorist, denied and belittled the Holocaust, been overtly or covertly anti-Semitic, claimed Israel-Nazi links etc, didn't see the funny side and I was too exhausted to debate any more):


We at the lizardoid neo-con mind-meld faction of aSW would like to thank you for your decision, as we were hopelessly outnumbered by the waves of people who shouted louder and got more emotional than us and were therefore obviously right. We assure you that a cheque will be in the post just as soon as we make some money from our recently-acquired Iraqi oilwells, unless we have to fund a hostile takeover in Tehran first...

All the best

Michael F
ZOG HQ, Tel Aviv

Dear Neo-Con and/or Secretly-Horned aSW members (all 14 of you)

The Most Zionist Elder of the Lizardoid Council has asked me to interject here to point out that Scott's decision was in no way related to the recent sale of a very substantial stake of aSW to a member of our Council, as this would not be in keeping with the Protocols, which require much more subtlety of their members.

For example, we had managed to keep the following secret, until recently uncovered by aSW members on these boards:

- the whole ongoing Zionist-Nazi conspiracy
- how Israel is actually secretly a Nazi inheritor state, hell-bent on genocide
- how our beloved IDF was using chemical weapons in Lebanon
- that the Yanks have given us laser-guided bombs especially so we can maximise the civilian casualties, because for reasons I am not allowed to go into in public, this is strategically in our interests
- that I am actually a terrorist mouthpiece and rabid extremist
- that the Holocaust maybe didn't happen, or was certainly exaggerated
- assorted stuff we had kept secret about widespread Jewish terrorism

It's very sad that all our evil secrets have come out, but now they have, we respect Scott's totally independent choice to shut the threads down. We at the ZOG HQ are sure his decision was not influenced in any way by the fact that we have used our conspiratorial powers to make some of the claims of certain aSW-ers illegal in certain countries, as well as amounting to national and personal libel or slander in others, and we have certainly done a thorough job in dressing up these wholly true and justified accusations against Israel as anti-Semitism. Luckily, we have the most expensive lawyers, and also have the judiciary in our pockets anyway, so calls for extremists and terrorists like me to be banned from aSW have fallen on deaf ears.

Scott, as we said, cheque's in the post, just as soon as we get that damn Prudhoe Bay oilfield pumping again. Seems that shut-downs are endemic these days...


Dear Most Zionist Elder

Apologies, I swear on the secret map of Greater Israel from Nile to Euphrates that I shall atone for this error, but I think I just sent this to everyone at aSW instead of just the neo-cons. Please tell me what I can do to correct this - perhaps another 3 years in the Zionazi Occupying Forces, either in the Middle East or Hollywood?

Junior Lizardoid
(Oil Wealth Expropriation Division)

No comments: